Romantic double standard

What’s the most annoying trope in books or movies?

I believe the most annoying trope in books and movies is that there exists a double standard in stories of romantic pursuit. We all know the boy-gets-girl trope. For one example, in Dead Poets Society, Knox relentlessly pursues Chris until she finally giggles and calls him “infuriating” and they get together. Examples abound in TV as well—The Big Bang Theory comes to mind. Flip the genders. If Knox had been a female character, there would have been no “carpe diem” rationalization for her stalking behaviour—on the contrary, she would have been villainized as a dangerous psychopath. Think of Alicia Silverstone’s character in The Crush. Usually, when a female protagonist is in love with a stranger, the writers eventually make her change her mind—or get to “know her own mind”—and have her fall in love with a different man who has already chosen her. While You Were Sleeping comes to mind there. In my opinion, this double standard sends a problematic message to women and girls: Don’t trust your feelings, wait to be chosen, or you risk vilification, humiliation, and certain rejection.


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Naomi Vondell

Naomi Vondell is a Canadian writer of literary fiction with spiritual undertones, emotional resonance, and a touch of quiet humour. She lives in Northwestern Ontario, having spent most of her adult life in Toronto and the surrounding area. Her work explores themes of identity, memory, faith, and transformation. A lifelong storyteller, Naomi’s creative path has included acting, songwriting, and screenwriting. She holds a Master’s degree in clinical psychology and worked for years as a psychometrist before turning to fiction full-time. She earned her Creative Writing Certificate from the University of Toronto and studied screenwriting through UCLA Extension, where she trained with industry professionals—including a Star Trek: The Next Generation writer. Naomi is also a caregiver, a lover of Shakespeare and Buster Keaton, a fan of classic sitcoms and naval history, and a survivor of childhood bullying due to her neurodivergence. Her writing is shaped by curiosity, compassion, and a deep reverence for stories that reach across time. She is currently at work on a play (The Shell), two feature films (Going Global and a body-swap political satire), and a companion story collection titled Before the Light.

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